Today I am 15 weeks! YAY We are making it slowly and surely. I am late getting this last Doc report out, so sorry. This last Thurs was another Doc apt for us. This was a check up from the surgery and a reg Doc visit to see how I am doing etc etc.
Doc B let us know that when she went in to put the cercladge in I was already dilated to 1 (she could stick her pinky in my cervix) so it was a really good thing we had it put in at 12 weeks because I could of gotten a serious infection and already lost the baby. Thank God for a Doc who is on top of what needs to be done. She checked to make sure the stitch was ok and boy! Did I find out exactly what was giving me so much pain here lately!
We talked about the pains I’ve been having and she said when I got the cercladge with Donavan my uterus was a lot larger (18weeks versus 12 weeks) so there was a lot less pains than this time. With my uterus being so much smaller when they put it in, every growth in my uterus will send pains, plus certain movements will cause pains also. And boy have I found this to be true!
This week or early next week I am having blood work done to screen for possible health problems in the baby. This is to find out if the baby has D.S. or C.F. The tests can be wrong but either way I had this done with Donavan also. I want to know in advance if something is wrong so that I can learn all there is about it, tho like anyone else, we pray for a healthy baby.
I will also be having my first Glucose Test done to see if I have Gest Diabetes. I’ve already tested neg early on, and if I test neg this time they will check again at 28 weeks. BLAH I hate doing this test.
We had yet another ultra sound done of the baby. This kid is looking just like its daddy already! HA If you didn’t see the you tube of the U/S please let me know and I will send it out again. We find out the baby’s gender on March 11th, I will be 20 weeks on that day so it will be totally accurate as to what the gender is. So I have a month to wonder HA. We are totally satisfied with our two girl name choices, but still going back and forth on a boy name. We find one we like and then I find something wrong with it! GRRR So if this is a boy we will need everyone’s help picking out a boy name that sounds good next to Donavan.
I’ve been having ppl ask how Donavan is doing with all of this. He is doing really good for what he can understand. Sometimes when I tell him he is going to be a big brother he gets really upset and other times he gets happy and kisses my belly and hugs it and says baby with a big smile, so we will see! HA Once the baby gets here and he see’s its his baby I know he will be happy as much as a 3 ½ yr old will be able to be knowing they won’t have all of mom and dad’s attention 24/7 HA
Ok that’s all for now. Love to all, thanks for your prayers on our behalf.
Wednesday, February 4, 2009
Friday, January 16, 2009
Update on Surgery and pregnancy and baby
Today I am 12w 2.7 d and all is well! ****For those of you who know my story you can skip down to the bold font to know how yesterday went****
Most of you know that Thurs, Jan 15th I had a date to have surgery and I was really dreading it so let me explain a little bit as to why.
When I lost my daughter back in 05 it was due to a severe infection that I got because I was dilating out and we didn’t know it, so an infection got in my placenta and I lost my baby at 18 w 3.7 days and it was quite the traumatic experience.
With my son Donavan my Doc said he was positive I had an incompetent cervix and he wanted me to get a cercladge put in ( I will explain what that is for those who don’t know) at 10 weeks. He sent me to a specialist and they refused, said that Doc C couldn’t prove that I had an incompetent cervix so they wanted me to abort my son so they could run tests to find out if it was true and we could start over! Once again right at 18w 3.7 d with Donavan I started dilating out again. This time my Doc MADE them put the cercladge in.
He explained to me what would happened, or let me say what should of happened. The whole experience was a nightmare and I am not exaggerating one bit. I wasn’t numbed correctly after poking me 10 times with the needle, and they didn’t believe me when I told them so. After the surgery that I could feel everything being done on! They wouldn’t believe that I was in pain and refused to give me anything for almost 2 hrs. It was supposed to be an out patient surgery and I was there 3 days. They kept telling me I was loosing Donavan not just having cramps and on and on. I came home in so much pain and they wouldn’t give me any meds for it. I was bleeding horribly and cramping really bad. Just the whole thing was just a really horrible experience.
What I had with Donavan was an emergency cercladge that could have been avoided.
A cercladge is a procedure that can be done for women who have incompetent cervix’s to keep them from dilating and getting an infection in their placenta or uterus. This can be done at almost any time during your pregnancy, but if you are diagnosed with I.C. like me they want to get it in before you have any signs of infection or dilating out. So in my case Doc B wanted it put in between 12-14 weeks, the sooner the better. They take this thick rope like black tape and they sew up the cervix kind of like a coin purse that you pull together to keep it closed.
So this is what happened on Thus. (the above is for those who haven’t followed my story til now)
We got to the hospital really early cuz I was starving from going without food and water so long and I was hoping to get the ball rolling.
I was at McKee Medical Center here in Loveland. They took us back to the surgery center and I got to meet everyone who would be working with me that day. They were all in the room at the same time Doc, Anesthesiologist, the nurses, everyone it was kind of funny. The Doc, and the Anes. Stayed in the room so we could make a plan of action. I REALLY like this Anes. When we told him my story he was shocked and could understand my anxiety and was determined to make this one a better one. I asked to be put under, I really didn’t want to be awake. He said it was my choice and that this was the diff between the spinal block and being put under. The spinal block recovery time is a lot longer, but the amount of meds used are about the same as being put under. I would be there for about 3 hrs to make sure I could walk by myself and I would have to have a catheter! ICK Being put under, I can leave after I wake up and my vitals are good. And no catheter!
So of course I REALLY wanted to be put under.
The staff here at McKee were so awesome! I was more than pleased. They had so much compassion and were so kind to me and Kels. We both felt very comfortable and relaxed in no time, that all would go so much better this time.
We got to see the baby and the HB before I went in, which helped me relax that much more. The baby was in its back and looked up at us with both arms and legs moving and wiggling letting us know that it was fine. This one once again has Kels’ chin! Lol they all do! Lol
The operation lasted 25 min, then there was another 25 min til I woke up and Kels could come and be with me. And I left in about 30 min after that. Every time I felt pain, they gave me meds right then, no waiting around. I had no bleeding this time. And mostly just cramping very mildly. They went ahead and sent me home with meds just incase and I only had to take a couple. My throat is sore from the tubes. But otherwise I am just fine.
I can’t do anything no tho. No lifting, very little walking, etc etc so that is a bummer.
I told kels so THIS is what Doc C was expecting me to go thru with Donavan! WOW what a difference!
The cercladge will be taken out first week of July, but til then there will be a lot of pain once the baby starts kicking and head butting this stitch. So please pray that I do well!
Thanks for all your prayers for us. We really are doing great!
From now on I will be seeing Doc B every two weeks, and we will find out the sex of the baby around mid Feb, so very exciting and lots going on.
Most of you know that Thurs, Jan 15th I had a date to have surgery and I was really dreading it so let me explain a little bit as to why.
When I lost my daughter back in 05 it was due to a severe infection that I got because I was dilating out and we didn’t know it, so an infection got in my placenta and I lost my baby at 18 w 3.7 days and it was quite the traumatic experience.
With my son Donavan my Doc said he was positive I had an incompetent cervix and he wanted me to get a cercladge put in ( I will explain what that is for those who don’t know) at 10 weeks. He sent me to a specialist and they refused, said that Doc C couldn’t prove that I had an incompetent cervix so they wanted me to abort my son so they could run tests to find out if it was true and we could start over! Once again right at 18w 3.7 d with Donavan I started dilating out again. This time my Doc MADE them put the cercladge in.
He explained to me what would happened, or let me say what should of happened. The whole experience was a nightmare and I am not exaggerating one bit. I wasn’t numbed correctly after poking me 10 times with the needle, and they didn’t believe me when I told them so. After the surgery that I could feel everything being done on! They wouldn’t believe that I was in pain and refused to give me anything for almost 2 hrs. It was supposed to be an out patient surgery and I was there 3 days. They kept telling me I was loosing Donavan not just having cramps and on and on. I came home in so much pain and they wouldn’t give me any meds for it. I was bleeding horribly and cramping really bad. Just the whole thing was just a really horrible experience.
What I had with Donavan was an emergency cercladge that could have been avoided.
A cercladge is a procedure that can be done for women who have incompetent cervix’s to keep them from dilating and getting an infection in their placenta or uterus. This can be done at almost any time during your pregnancy, but if you are diagnosed with I.C. like me they want to get it in before you have any signs of infection or dilating out. So in my case Doc B wanted it put in between 12-14 weeks, the sooner the better. They take this thick rope like black tape and they sew up the cervix kind of like a coin purse that you pull together to keep it closed.
So this is what happened on Thus. (the above is for those who haven’t followed my story til now)
We got to the hospital really early cuz I was starving from going without food and water so long and I was hoping to get the ball rolling.
I was at McKee Medical Center here in Loveland. They took us back to the surgery center and I got to meet everyone who would be working with me that day. They were all in the room at the same time Doc, Anesthesiologist, the nurses, everyone it was kind of funny. The Doc, and the Anes. Stayed in the room so we could make a plan of action. I REALLY like this Anes. When we told him my story he was shocked and could understand my anxiety and was determined to make this one a better one. I asked to be put under, I really didn’t want to be awake. He said it was my choice and that this was the diff between the spinal block and being put under. The spinal block recovery time is a lot longer, but the amount of meds used are about the same as being put under. I would be there for about 3 hrs to make sure I could walk by myself and I would have to have a catheter! ICK Being put under, I can leave after I wake up and my vitals are good. And no catheter!
So of course I REALLY wanted to be put under.
The staff here at McKee were so awesome! I was more than pleased. They had so much compassion and were so kind to me and Kels. We both felt very comfortable and relaxed in no time, that all would go so much better this time.
We got to see the baby and the HB before I went in, which helped me relax that much more. The baby was in its back and looked up at us with both arms and legs moving and wiggling letting us know that it was fine. This one once again has Kels’ chin! Lol they all do! Lol
The operation lasted 25 min, then there was another 25 min til I woke up and Kels could come and be with me. And I left in about 30 min after that. Every time I felt pain, they gave me meds right then, no waiting around. I had no bleeding this time. And mostly just cramping very mildly. They went ahead and sent me home with meds just incase and I only had to take a couple. My throat is sore from the tubes. But otherwise I am just fine.
I can’t do anything no tho. No lifting, very little walking, etc etc so that is a bummer.
I told kels so THIS is what Doc C was expecting me to go thru with Donavan! WOW what a difference!
The cercladge will be taken out first week of July, but til then there will be a lot of pain once the baby starts kicking and head butting this stitch. So please pray that I do well!
Thanks for all your prayers for us. We really are doing great!
From now on I will be seeing Doc B every two weeks, and we will find out the sex of the baby around mid Feb, so very exciting and lots going on.
Update on pregnancy and baby
Yesterday was my second Doc visit. I am 11.2/7 today and I’m doing great. We had an U/S yesterday and the baby looks perfect! Growing, growing, almost up to size. HB was 168 which is really good! My blood tests came back great! No sign of G/D this time which is just awesome!! I am praying that it stays that way. We will be testing again later on to make sure it stays away, which is fine by me. I will be having a cercladge put in between now and the 22nd of this month. I will be getting a call today on the exact day. I am totally prepared for this one. MY doc went over everything with me to prepare me and this will be an out patient thing so no three day stay this time! We are getting the cercladge in now before any dilating starts so that I will have no chance of infection. She is giving me some antibiotics the day before and the day after to make sure I get no infection. She showed me exactly what she will do and what it will look like etc etc so I am already feeling much better about all of this. Unless I go into labor early or something happens to my cervix or uterus, they will take out the cercladge at 36 weeks which is July 1st, which means a huge chance of a 4th of July baby!! I DEF! won’t need to be watching fire works that night, I will be planning a party of my own! LOL!!!! Anyway everything is looking great! The baby measured a little larger this time, getting closer to being right on the due date. Makes me a little sad, I was hoping for a small baby! Maybe I will still get lucky we will see.
My Doc is Ginger Budd, so from now on I will be talking about Doc B. I really like her. I felt really comfortable with her and her staff. She has a plan of action and she listens really well to me and wants whats best for me and the baby. She spent a good deal of time with me listening to how I felt about certain things and set my mind at ease on a LOT of things. The office is really nice and the radiologist is super nice since we will see a lot of e/o! lol From now on I will be seeing my Doc every two weeks!!! I know I do nothing easy do I, but I am used to a lot of Doc apts so that’s perfectly fine with me. We are going to do progesterone shots this time. It drops the chance of a preemie by 50% and since we had such a hard time keeping Donavan in that sounds GREAT! To me. No complaints from me let me tell ya. I will still deal with all the kicking and head butting on the stitch which I am NOT looking FWD to AT ALL! But at least I will know what to do this time to help it stop so that’s a good thing.
Well that’s about it. We are all happy and doing really well!!
My Doc is Ginger Budd, so from now on I will be talking about Doc B. I really like her. I felt really comfortable with her and her staff. She has a plan of action and she listens really well to me and wants whats best for me and the baby. She spent a good deal of time with me listening to how I felt about certain things and set my mind at ease on a LOT of things. The office is really nice and the radiologist is super nice since we will see a lot of e/o! lol From now on I will be seeing my Doc every two weeks!!! I know I do nothing easy do I, but I am used to a lot of Doc apts so that’s perfectly fine with me. We are going to do progesterone shots this time. It drops the chance of a preemie by 50% and since we had such a hard time keeping Donavan in that sounds GREAT! To me. No complaints from me let me tell ya. I will still deal with all the kicking and head butting on the stitch which I am NOT looking FWD to AT ALL! But at least I will know what to do this time to help it stop so that’s a good thing.
Well that’s about it. We are all happy and doing really well!!
Thursday, December 11, 2008
A baby and a heartbeat! what a wonderful day
Hey guys,
Today we had our first doc visit. They did an ultrasound and we saw a little jelly bean in there just wiggling around with a heartbeat of 125. They said that is really great for this size.
I am 7 weeks exactly today. The baby measured 6.3/7 weeks so a little on the small side and I am hoping it stays that way since Donavan was a moose! HA
If you didn't know that I was pregnant please be sure to read the blog before this one to know what is going onI had a very! hard time getting a new Doc because of how much I loved having Doc C take care of us. This time I went to a high risk specialist and i think I will really like it. They are on top of what needs to be done. They want to do a cercladge at 14 weeks since I HAD to have one with Donavan at 18.3/7 just to be on the safe side.
All is well, I am doing so great with this one, its amazing!
Love to all, hope you are having a wonderful Holiday Season!
Abby~
Today we had our first doc visit. They did an ultrasound and we saw a little jelly bean in there just wiggling around with a heartbeat of 125. They said that is really great for this size.
I am 7 weeks exactly today. The baby measured 6.3/7 weeks so a little on the small side and I am hoping it stays that way since Donavan was a moose! HA
If you didn't know that I was pregnant please be sure to read the blog before this one to know what is going onI had a very! hard time getting a new Doc because of how much I loved having Doc C take care of us. This time I went to a high risk specialist and i think I will really like it. They are on top of what needs to be done. They want to do a cercladge at 14 weeks since I HAD to have one with Donavan at 18.3/7 just to be on the safe side.
All is well, I am doing so great with this one, its amazing!
Love to all, hope you are having a wonderful Holiday Season!
Abby~
Friday, December 5, 2008
A lot of ppl dont know our story so I will share a small piece of it.This is my fourth pregnancy. I have a sweet little boy that is getting closer to 3 everyday! But I wasn't one of those women who woke up one day and said I want a baby, and BAM! got pregnant. I lossed two sweet babies first. And one of the I carried for 18 weeks and 3 days, it was a girl.
Then there was Donavan Cade, I had him at 35weeks and 6 days. I was on fertility against my Doc's wishes. He was really worried about my emotional state from the loss of my daughter. While I was expecting Donavan I almost lost him several times, it was a very scary time. But I had a promise from God that everything was going to be ok. Donavan is quite the fighter. He is so strong and he loves life. He was in the NICU for 3 weeks before coming home on a breathing machine. He is my miracle baby, and I can't imagine life without him.
To get pregnant I have to be on fertilty drugs. I had to be on it for the last two pregnancy's.
In Jan of this yr, my husband and I started talking about if we wanted a second child. We knew what we would have to go thru. See my body doesn't seem to enjoy being pregnant. There are some serious things I have to go thru. I get Ges. Diab. I have to get a cercladge ( a stitch in the cervix to keep the baby from coming early) So I am considered high risk.
Well we did some blood test and more blood test and it was becoming very clear that once again if I wanted another baby it would only happen with fertility drugs and a LOT of Doc visits. Well we talked and each month we put it off again. I did two cycles of clomid and nothing happened. So I really knew my chances of another child was pretty slim.
Since we've moved to Colorado I have yet to get a family Doc so I just kept putting wanting another child on the back burner and we just talked about it. During this whole time of living here in Colorado my body started going thru some serious changes. I was kind of freaking out about it all. I was talking with Kelsey and my aunt pretty seriously about how I was worried about what was going on and really felt like I needed to get to a Doc soon.
Well sometime in the middle of Nov, Kels and I sat down and looked at a calendar and we noticed my body was actually starting to act totally normal and that some of the issues I was having may be gone. So we talked about trying to get pregnant in Dec. Well I was late on my cycle, which hasn't happened in months so I decided to do a test in the morning. I wasn't feeling pregnant at all just wanted to know what was going on. Well the next morning I did the test and went back to bed! I didn't even look at it because I knew there was no way I was pregnant! A few hours later I got up and saw the test and litterly freaked out and turned on every light I could. Then called Kelsey! I was soooo shocked I didn't even know how to react. So I called my mom too who of course thought it was awesome!
I didn't know if it was a false test, tho I never get positives at home, I usually have to go to a doc to get a positive. Then that night I was prayed over by someone who didn't know anything about my story and he said I see a new beginning and I want to pray over it. So of course I start crying knowing what he's talking about. I waited 4 days and took another test and it was soooo bright! I've only ever had very faint lines so this was so odd!
We went to a clinic to do another test and sure enough WE ARE SOOO PREGNANT! The same day we went to the clinc Kelsey gets a call from his boss that he is laying off 4 ppl and Kels is one of them. My first reaction is to just totally freak out. Here it is almost christmas and I am pregnant and I have a son, and this is just not a good time for anyone to be without a job. I stopped myself and said ok God, there is no way you would give me such an awesome miracle if you hadn't planed on providing for it, I know YOU have a plan. I was at peace almost instantly.
Kelsey and I got to talking and I said, you should call Jon ( a man in our church who is head manager at a local Wal-Mart) and talk to him about working there before this week is out. Well the more we talked the more we felt like he needed to pick up that phone and dial right that minute. SO he called, and Jon said this being so close to Christmas he was pretty sure nothing would be available til January. We just said ok, and Jon said let me make some calls and see what I can find out.
First thing Tues morning, less than 24 hours after Kelsey called Jon, Jon calls and says how soon can you get to the North Loveland Wal-Mart to fill out an app? Kels said I am on my way. Kelsey gets there fills out the app, in less than ten min, he gets a call on his cell saying how soon can we interview you? Kels said, I haven't left the store! She said give me ten minutes and come on back. She said I know yyou filled this out for a maintence job, but all your answers to these questions were manager level answers. I really don't think you would like to be a maintence man, how about working the dairy and frozen stock overnight instead. It pays more. Kels said yes! of course!
They sent him right then to do a drug test and THE NEXT DAY he went to orientation and tonight is his frist night at work. OK you N EVER hear of this, on the job in just days!!! It can take forever to get thru all the red tape at Wal-Mart. Wednesday Kelsey talked with Jon about it and his jaw dropped, he said never in all my years of working at WM has this ever happened.
God is so awesome and we are so thankful for all of his overflowing blessing on us.
Then there was Donavan Cade, I had him at 35weeks and 6 days. I was on fertility against my Doc's wishes. He was really worried about my emotional state from the loss of my daughter. While I was expecting Donavan I almost lost him several times, it was a very scary time. But I had a promise from God that everything was going to be ok. Donavan is quite the fighter. He is so strong and he loves life. He was in the NICU for 3 weeks before coming home on a breathing machine. He is my miracle baby, and I can't imagine life without him.
To get pregnant I have to be on fertilty drugs. I had to be on it for the last two pregnancy's.
In Jan of this yr, my husband and I started talking about if we wanted a second child. We knew what we would have to go thru. See my body doesn't seem to enjoy being pregnant. There are some serious things I have to go thru. I get Ges. Diab. I have to get a cercladge ( a stitch in the cervix to keep the baby from coming early) So I am considered high risk.
Well we did some blood test and more blood test and it was becoming very clear that once again if I wanted another baby it would only happen with fertility drugs and a LOT of Doc visits. Well we talked and each month we put it off again. I did two cycles of clomid and nothing happened. So I really knew my chances of another child was pretty slim.
Since we've moved to Colorado I have yet to get a family Doc so I just kept putting wanting another child on the back burner and we just talked about it. During this whole time of living here in Colorado my body started going thru some serious changes. I was kind of freaking out about it all. I was talking with Kelsey and my aunt pretty seriously about how I was worried about what was going on and really felt like I needed to get to a Doc soon.
Well sometime in the middle of Nov, Kels and I sat down and looked at a calendar and we noticed my body was actually starting to act totally normal and that some of the issues I was having may be gone. So we talked about trying to get pregnant in Dec. Well I was late on my cycle, which hasn't happened in months so I decided to do a test in the morning. I wasn't feeling pregnant at all just wanted to know what was going on. Well the next morning I did the test and went back to bed! I didn't even look at it because I knew there was no way I was pregnant! A few hours later I got up and saw the test and litterly freaked out and turned on every light I could. Then called Kelsey! I was soooo shocked I didn't even know how to react. So I called my mom too who of course thought it was awesome!
I didn't know if it was a false test, tho I never get positives at home, I usually have to go to a doc to get a positive. Then that night I was prayed over by someone who didn't know anything about my story and he said I see a new beginning and I want to pray over it. So of course I start crying knowing what he's talking about. I waited 4 days and took another test and it was soooo bright! I've only ever had very faint lines so this was so odd!
We went to a clinic to do another test and sure enough WE ARE SOOO PREGNANT! The same day we went to the clinc Kelsey gets a call from his boss that he is laying off 4 ppl and Kels is one of them. My first reaction is to just totally freak out. Here it is almost christmas and I am pregnant and I have a son, and this is just not a good time for anyone to be without a job. I stopped myself and said ok God, there is no way you would give me such an awesome miracle if you hadn't planed on providing for it, I know YOU have a plan. I was at peace almost instantly.
Kelsey and I got to talking and I said, you should call Jon ( a man in our church who is head manager at a local Wal-Mart) and talk to him about working there before this week is out. Well the more we talked the more we felt like he needed to pick up that phone and dial right that minute. SO he called, and Jon said this being so close to Christmas he was pretty sure nothing would be available til January. We just said ok, and Jon said let me make some calls and see what I can find out.
First thing Tues morning, less than 24 hours after Kelsey called Jon, Jon calls and says how soon can you get to the North Loveland Wal-Mart to fill out an app? Kels said I am on my way. Kelsey gets there fills out the app, in less than ten min, he gets a call on his cell saying how soon can we interview you? Kels said, I haven't left the store! She said give me ten minutes and come on back. She said I know yyou filled this out for a maintence job, but all your answers to these questions were manager level answers. I really don't think you would like to be a maintence man, how about working the dairy and frozen stock overnight instead. It pays more. Kels said yes! of course!
They sent him right then to do a drug test and THE NEXT DAY he went to orientation and tonight is his frist night at work. OK you N EVER hear of this, on the job in just days!!! It can take forever to get thru all the red tape at Wal-Mart. Wednesday Kelsey talked with Jon about it and his jaw dropped, he said never in all my years of working at WM has this ever happened.
God is so awesome and we are so thankful for all of his overflowing blessing on us.
Monday, December 1, 2008
Very Exciting News!!!
Well we have news! Exciting news, wonderful news of a miracle in our lives. I am pregnant! And without fertility help or anything, its just so shocking! I am doing really good, no sickness, and I was having leg cramps and lower stomach cramps. The stomach cramps have stopped but still having some leg cramps. I am having heartburn all the time on and off everyday and but if this is it I will be so thrilled!
I am in shock and in awe over God’s miracle in our lives. I was told over and over its not going to happen and it did! We’ve already been given a word from God on it, which is always an awesome thing, and such a blessing.
For those of you reading this, make sure to keep me in your prayers. I am praying I can go all the way with no complications. With Donavan at this point I couldn’t even sit at church I would have to lay down from the cramping and pain in my legs and uterus. I also had a really sore spot on my side and had to lay on one side only. I wasn’t sick at all but I could already tell that I had sugar problems with anything I ate.
At this point there is none of that going on and I can’t tell you how grateful and blessed I feel about that. For those of you who know our story you know what a miracle this all is.
My due date is the end of July. And I am determined to make it to the end this time. I haven’t found me a Doctor yet, I really miss Doc C right now A LOT, and I am praying I can find one just as good here, so please keep me in your prayers on that subject.
I am in shock and in awe over God’s miracle in our lives. I was told over and over its not going to happen and it did! We’ve already been given a word from God on it, which is always an awesome thing, and such a blessing.
For those of you reading this, make sure to keep me in your prayers. I am praying I can go all the way with no complications. With Donavan at this point I couldn’t even sit at church I would have to lay down from the cramping and pain in my legs and uterus. I also had a really sore spot on my side and had to lay on one side only. I wasn’t sick at all but I could already tell that I had sugar problems with anything I ate.
At this point there is none of that going on and I can’t tell you how grateful and blessed I feel about that. For those of you who know our story you know what a miracle this all is.
My due date is the end of July. And I am determined to make it to the end this time. I haven’t found me a Doctor yet, I really miss Doc C right now A LOT, and I am praying I can find one just as good here, so please keep me in your prayers on that subject.
Friday, October 17, 2008
What are you doing to change your world?
Its been awhile. I’m starting to feel like all my blogs need to start this way because there seems to be such a large laps in-between each one. I can’t say that everything has been great since my last blog, but I can say that I have seen the hand of God in my life and in the life of my family more than I ever have before.
I wish I could say that life was all sunshine and roses, but that is so untrue. Yes we have our moments, sometimes hours, sometimes days and yes even sometimes weeks where it will seem like that. Being on the mountain top is a wonderful thing. But to get to the top of the mountain, you have to start at the bottom and work your way up. Now I’ve never climbed a mountain literally, I know SHOCK! HA But I do know that it takes a lot of sweat and sometimes blood and sometimes tears and sometimes you will fall and have to start over or it’s a little setback and you have to go back over some of the ground that you have just climbed, more than likely looking a little more carefully at places to grab on to and finding safe places to put your foot that will stabilize you for your next reach.
Life is so much like that. We can’t enjoy the mountain top times without going thru a valley and doing some climbing. But oh how beautiful it is and how victorious we feel when we can look back from where we came and look down on what we were going thru, our valley, and see the big picture to how we got to where we are. When we are up there we can look down and see where God’s hand was in our lives, and why we went thru some of the things that got us to where we are today.
The past few months have been really ruff on our family. To say that we are in the valley right now would be an understatement! My brother Jared was engaged to a wonderful young lady named Kayla Pack. (Some of you have kept up with the story I’m sure.) I had the chance to meet her once at my parents house. They had a small birthday party for Donavan and Jared brought Kayla. Kayla was so kind and brought Donavan a bubble blowing George for his bath, which Donavan fell inlove with! Kayla and I emailed back and forth quite a bit and of course Jared and my parents sang her praises whenever we talked. Jared told me he was ready to ask her to marry him and the future shined bright. I had went to her myspace to read anything she had about herself in there and her about me and who I would like to meet moved me, and I knew Kayla and Jared had a ministry together working with youth and children. That God’s hand was Def in this.
Then all came crashing down when Jared called to let us know that Kayla was being rushed to the hospital. I knew in my heart that this was it but I prayed and believed a miracle was around the corner and she would come out of it. Kelsey and I prayed and prayed, so much so that I would wake up with a jolt saying KAYLA and check the phone and email to make sure something hadn’t happened while I was asleep. I’ve never had that feeling before, but during it all there was this peace that no matter what happened God’s hand was in it and everything would turn out right. We called several ppl, put out several emails everywhere to everyone we knew asking for prayer and the emails and calls started rolling in saying I don’t know what it is about her but I feel connected to her and I know that God has his hand in this. The reports of things that were happening in others lives while they were praying for Kayla was amazing! And they aren’t over I’m sure.
During all of this Kels and I asked each other some serious questions. What kind of an impact have we made on our world? Would as many ppl care if it was one of us lying there? Would we be at peace with God knowing our future is in His hands and that we would be with him if that were the outcome?
Late one night I remembered reading Kayla’s myspace and what an impact it had made on me knowing what kind of a young woman she was and I decided to read it again and look into sending it out as an email to all who were praying for her. Her site is set to private and normally I would respect that as someone who didn’t want to be invaded but so many ppl were praying for her without knowing who she was and this explained her so well. As I sat there reading it, I started crying again and asked God why. I know we don’t understand why things happen but reading this God I can see perfectly the kind of ministry Kayla and Jared would have, how you would use them to reach children and young ppl. Its hard to find someone with a burden this strong Lord, surely Your plan is bigger than ours. And on I went trying to understand but knowing God’s way is always so perfect even when we can’t see it.
I never would of dreamed the phone would ring so soon with the sad news. My uncle called me and said, As of 4:30pm the state of Arkansas has pronounced her dead. And I looked at my clock and said, How can they do that its only 4:05pm!! Tim said umm Abby its after 5 here. (Of all times to have blond moments I know.)
To say I knew how Jared was feeling and how the family was feeling at that moment would be a lie. I am no stranger to death. Death has been at my door a few times to say the least. And to say that I know what kind of grief and pain that Jared and my family and Kayla’s family and friends were feeling at that moment wouldn’t be true either. But I do know what its like to have a dream die, to see future taken from you suddenly that I do know how it feels. To loose a daughter I know how that feels. To miss out on a wedding of your child and the birth of their children, to have the chance of being able to watch them grow to their full potential snatched away from you, I know how that feels. I know what its like to walk into a room that laughter will never ring the walls, that the clothes laying out and in the drawers and closet will never be warn, I know how that feels. To sit on a pew with tears rolling down your face holding a loved ones hand hoping its all a bad dream and someone will pinch you awake, pain so strong in your chest that it feels like someone has taken oxygen away from you and you are trying to breathe on your own and yet you feel numb from head to toe like you are living someone else’s life and why can’t you comfort them only to find out the one going thru the pain is yourself. Yes I do know what death is on a family.
We grieve for ourselves, because they are in no more pain nor will they ever have heartache or misery in their life ever again. I am not saying its selfish in the least because it isn’t. Just sometimes we get locked up in our grief for the moment the valley time if you want to call it that, and I think that’s ok. Jesus wept for his friend Lazarus when he was at his graveside. Jesus had lost someone He loved and wasn’t able to say good-bye. I know that story ends completely different than this one but at that moment Mary and Martha didn’t know that. They blamed God for not getting there sooner, and sometimes we do that too. I think its apart of the process, the need to lash out at someone in the midst of our pain. Sometimes grief is unbearable. One thing I learned is to embrace it as part of the healing process. Take a few minutes or however much time you need but set a limit and when that time is up each day, to set it aside as much as you can and to go on. Do something kind for yourself each day be it a walk or just time to read a book. Be a little selfish and call that friend who said is there anything I can do just let me know, and let them be there for you because trust me, there will come a time when you will need to be there for them! Don’t be afraid to set aside the grief everyday, just hold on to the fact that tomorrow you can embrace that pain again and let it out some more for a set amount of time. As the days slip away you will find that you don’t embrace the grief so readily because you have been working thru it all this time. I don’t know if that is what the pro’s tell you to do but I found it the best way instead of sitting around crying all day for days on end, ending up in depression and full of guilt for not doing anything because you sit around crying and you lock yourself in a room and don’t let anyone in to help. Rest assured the first of everything after a death is super hard, be it the first 24 hrs, to the first church service to the first holiday, they all hard. Then there are the times that it sneaks up on you when you expect it the least too. Writing down how you are feeling as often as you need to helps too. Everyone deals with pain differently I think is one thing to remember, just don’t hold it in because when it breaks out its usually worse than it would have been.
Going thru these valleys have a way of changing you. For some it makes you stronger, and for some it seems you just keep repeating the process over and over, you never make it to the mountain top. Even to this day I don’t understand some of the valley’s I’ve been thru. Maybe I haven’t reach the mountain top completely in all of the areas. Some of them I can look back and say OH that’s why! But others I may never know til I get to heaven and ask God. But I still trust him. No God doesn’t do things just the way I think they should be done. And no God doesn’t answer every why and how come. And yes sometimes he just says no or not yet or sorry I can’t tell you just trust me. Does that mean its always easy and I just walk away with a smile every time, absolutely not! But I have learned that if I trust in him and put my hand in his and sometimes say ok God just carry me because there is no way I can walk thru this, I have a peace that everything is going to work out. Oh how I wish I had all the answers to life’s questions and oh how I wish I had a secret salve for all the wounds that life hands out so readily, but sadly I don’t. There is a song that says sometimes God calms the storm and sometimes he calms me, and I think that wraps it up completely.
I don’t know the end of the story of Jared or my family or Kayla’s family. I don’t know if they all will come out of this without scars or bitterness or anger towards God. I pray they don’t but I don’t know that. But what I do know is that God is faithful. He loves Kayla so much more than we could of ever shown her. Yes she was and still is and would have been a great soul winner, but I think God knew that the life she lived here spoke loudly enough to us that in taking her lives would be changed and souls would be saved. Can you say that?
The Sunday after Kayla had passed away Bro Greg our pastor preached an awesome message and in it he talked about Kayla. I sat there with tears streaming down my face watching the alter fill up. Knowing that in her death her life was still changing ppl. What an awesome thing to be able to say. We don’t know when our last day is. One thing that was said Sunday was what if God wanted to take you this instant and the person sitting next to you is left behind ( its was where Peter is talking to Jesus and Jesus said you will die for my name) will you be upset because you were left behind and ask God why Lord why did you leave me and take him? And in that part I think it was in Luke, Jesus says what does it matter to you, if I take you now or let you live til I return? Just fallow me and do my work ( not how it was written out) That is some powerful statements, just do my work, keep preaching, keep teaching keep living a holy life for Christ’s sake.
Kayla didn’t just touch lives in Mena, or just in Arkansas. She touched lives all over the world and will continue to do so. I know she touched the lives of the Pentecostals Of Loveland, and we will never be the same because of it.
I know this blog is long, but I hope it stirs in you the challenge to change your world by BEING the change. Don’t wait on someone else.
I wish I could say that life was all sunshine and roses, but that is so untrue. Yes we have our moments, sometimes hours, sometimes days and yes even sometimes weeks where it will seem like that. Being on the mountain top is a wonderful thing. But to get to the top of the mountain, you have to start at the bottom and work your way up. Now I’ve never climbed a mountain literally, I know SHOCK! HA But I do know that it takes a lot of sweat and sometimes blood and sometimes tears and sometimes you will fall and have to start over or it’s a little setback and you have to go back over some of the ground that you have just climbed, more than likely looking a little more carefully at places to grab on to and finding safe places to put your foot that will stabilize you for your next reach.
Life is so much like that. We can’t enjoy the mountain top times without going thru a valley and doing some climbing. But oh how beautiful it is and how victorious we feel when we can look back from where we came and look down on what we were going thru, our valley, and see the big picture to how we got to where we are. When we are up there we can look down and see where God’s hand was in our lives, and why we went thru some of the things that got us to where we are today.
The past few months have been really ruff on our family. To say that we are in the valley right now would be an understatement! My brother Jared was engaged to a wonderful young lady named Kayla Pack. (Some of you have kept up with the story I’m sure.) I had the chance to meet her once at my parents house. They had a small birthday party for Donavan and Jared brought Kayla. Kayla was so kind and brought Donavan a bubble blowing George for his bath, which Donavan fell inlove with! Kayla and I emailed back and forth quite a bit and of course Jared and my parents sang her praises whenever we talked. Jared told me he was ready to ask her to marry him and the future shined bright. I had went to her myspace to read anything she had about herself in there and her about me and who I would like to meet moved me, and I knew Kayla and Jared had a ministry together working with youth and children. That God’s hand was Def in this.
Then all came crashing down when Jared called to let us know that Kayla was being rushed to the hospital. I knew in my heart that this was it but I prayed and believed a miracle was around the corner and she would come out of it. Kelsey and I prayed and prayed, so much so that I would wake up with a jolt saying KAYLA and check the phone and email to make sure something hadn’t happened while I was asleep. I’ve never had that feeling before, but during it all there was this peace that no matter what happened God’s hand was in it and everything would turn out right. We called several ppl, put out several emails everywhere to everyone we knew asking for prayer and the emails and calls started rolling in saying I don’t know what it is about her but I feel connected to her and I know that God has his hand in this. The reports of things that were happening in others lives while they were praying for Kayla was amazing! And they aren’t over I’m sure.
During all of this Kels and I asked each other some serious questions. What kind of an impact have we made on our world? Would as many ppl care if it was one of us lying there? Would we be at peace with God knowing our future is in His hands and that we would be with him if that were the outcome?
Late one night I remembered reading Kayla’s myspace and what an impact it had made on me knowing what kind of a young woman she was and I decided to read it again and look into sending it out as an email to all who were praying for her. Her site is set to private and normally I would respect that as someone who didn’t want to be invaded but so many ppl were praying for her without knowing who she was and this explained her so well. As I sat there reading it, I started crying again and asked God why. I know we don’t understand why things happen but reading this God I can see perfectly the kind of ministry Kayla and Jared would have, how you would use them to reach children and young ppl. Its hard to find someone with a burden this strong Lord, surely Your plan is bigger than ours. And on I went trying to understand but knowing God’s way is always so perfect even when we can’t see it.
I never would of dreamed the phone would ring so soon with the sad news. My uncle called me and said, As of 4:30pm the state of Arkansas has pronounced her dead. And I looked at my clock and said, How can they do that its only 4:05pm!! Tim said umm Abby its after 5 here. (Of all times to have blond moments I know.)
To say I knew how Jared was feeling and how the family was feeling at that moment would be a lie. I am no stranger to death. Death has been at my door a few times to say the least. And to say that I know what kind of grief and pain that Jared and my family and Kayla’s family and friends were feeling at that moment wouldn’t be true either. But I do know what its like to have a dream die, to see future taken from you suddenly that I do know how it feels. To loose a daughter I know how that feels. To miss out on a wedding of your child and the birth of their children, to have the chance of being able to watch them grow to their full potential snatched away from you, I know how that feels. I know what its like to walk into a room that laughter will never ring the walls, that the clothes laying out and in the drawers and closet will never be warn, I know how that feels. To sit on a pew with tears rolling down your face holding a loved ones hand hoping its all a bad dream and someone will pinch you awake, pain so strong in your chest that it feels like someone has taken oxygen away from you and you are trying to breathe on your own and yet you feel numb from head to toe like you are living someone else’s life and why can’t you comfort them only to find out the one going thru the pain is yourself. Yes I do know what death is on a family.
We grieve for ourselves, because they are in no more pain nor will they ever have heartache or misery in their life ever again. I am not saying its selfish in the least because it isn’t. Just sometimes we get locked up in our grief for the moment the valley time if you want to call it that, and I think that’s ok. Jesus wept for his friend Lazarus when he was at his graveside. Jesus had lost someone He loved and wasn’t able to say good-bye. I know that story ends completely different than this one but at that moment Mary and Martha didn’t know that. They blamed God for not getting there sooner, and sometimes we do that too. I think its apart of the process, the need to lash out at someone in the midst of our pain. Sometimes grief is unbearable. One thing I learned is to embrace it as part of the healing process. Take a few minutes or however much time you need but set a limit and when that time is up each day, to set it aside as much as you can and to go on. Do something kind for yourself each day be it a walk or just time to read a book. Be a little selfish and call that friend who said is there anything I can do just let me know, and let them be there for you because trust me, there will come a time when you will need to be there for them! Don’t be afraid to set aside the grief everyday, just hold on to the fact that tomorrow you can embrace that pain again and let it out some more for a set amount of time. As the days slip away you will find that you don’t embrace the grief so readily because you have been working thru it all this time. I don’t know if that is what the pro’s tell you to do but I found it the best way instead of sitting around crying all day for days on end, ending up in depression and full of guilt for not doing anything because you sit around crying and you lock yourself in a room and don’t let anyone in to help. Rest assured the first of everything after a death is super hard, be it the first 24 hrs, to the first church service to the first holiday, they all hard. Then there are the times that it sneaks up on you when you expect it the least too. Writing down how you are feeling as often as you need to helps too. Everyone deals with pain differently I think is one thing to remember, just don’t hold it in because when it breaks out its usually worse than it would have been.
Going thru these valleys have a way of changing you. For some it makes you stronger, and for some it seems you just keep repeating the process over and over, you never make it to the mountain top. Even to this day I don’t understand some of the valley’s I’ve been thru. Maybe I haven’t reach the mountain top completely in all of the areas. Some of them I can look back and say OH that’s why! But others I may never know til I get to heaven and ask God. But I still trust him. No God doesn’t do things just the way I think they should be done. And no God doesn’t answer every why and how come. And yes sometimes he just says no or not yet or sorry I can’t tell you just trust me. Does that mean its always easy and I just walk away with a smile every time, absolutely not! But I have learned that if I trust in him and put my hand in his and sometimes say ok God just carry me because there is no way I can walk thru this, I have a peace that everything is going to work out. Oh how I wish I had all the answers to life’s questions and oh how I wish I had a secret salve for all the wounds that life hands out so readily, but sadly I don’t. There is a song that says sometimes God calms the storm and sometimes he calms me, and I think that wraps it up completely.
I don’t know the end of the story of Jared or my family or Kayla’s family. I don’t know if they all will come out of this without scars or bitterness or anger towards God. I pray they don’t but I don’t know that. But what I do know is that God is faithful. He loves Kayla so much more than we could of ever shown her. Yes she was and still is and would have been a great soul winner, but I think God knew that the life she lived here spoke loudly enough to us that in taking her lives would be changed and souls would be saved. Can you say that?
The Sunday after Kayla had passed away Bro Greg our pastor preached an awesome message and in it he talked about Kayla. I sat there with tears streaming down my face watching the alter fill up. Knowing that in her death her life was still changing ppl. What an awesome thing to be able to say. We don’t know when our last day is. One thing that was said Sunday was what if God wanted to take you this instant and the person sitting next to you is left behind ( its was where Peter is talking to Jesus and Jesus said you will die for my name) will you be upset because you were left behind and ask God why Lord why did you leave me and take him? And in that part I think it was in Luke, Jesus says what does it matter to you, if I take you now or let you live til I return? Just fallow me and do my work ( not how it was written out) That is some powerful statements, just do my work, keep preaching, keep teaching keep living a holy life for Christ’s sake.
Kayla didn’t just touch lives in Mena, or just in Arkansas. She touched lives all over the world and will continue to do so. I know she touched the lives of the Pentecostals Of Loveland, and we will never be the same because of it.
I know this blog is long, but I hope it stirs in you the challenge to change your world by BEING the change. Don’t wait on someone else.
Friday, August 29, 2008
Summer is almost over!
Well its been quite a while since I’ve wrote in here. Can’t say a LOT has happened but we certainly have been busy.
Can’t believe that summer is almost over. This is our first summer here in CO and I can’t count how many times Kels and I have said, “ Boy I sure don’t miss those AR summers! LOL I wonder how many summers we will say that. One interesting thing is that a few Saturdays ago we looked out at the mountains and there was fresh snow! IN AUGUST!! Now that was a new one for me. We really love it here, and we have settled in so well and really feel like this is home.
Kelsey is in the process of looking for a new job. So far nothing. He is wanting a something a little more steady and we need ins, so if you are reading this please send up a prayer that he finds something soon. Right now he has been sending apps to some school’s to work on the computers. So far we haven’t heard anything but he was warned that they drag their feet about getting back to you, so he is trying to be patient.
Donavan is doing excellent!! He is HUGE!! He is wearing 4T shirts and 3T pants, size 9 shoe! He weighs about 32 lbs and he is 34 in tall. He is on a banana kick, its really funny. He was doing really good about saying banan or something like that but he is trying really hard to say it right. Since he was tiny we have let him watch some DVD’s I have on learning sign language and he is in this new kick of everything he says he wants to sign too. Its really great, we sit and go thru them several times a day it seems. Today he has been working really hard on apple. The great thing about it all is a few nights ago I think it was 9:30 or so, he came in our room with a blanket wrapped around him and said juice and starting signing good night. He was ready for bed, so we got his sippy and told him good night. We signed good night and sleep and I love you several times back and forth til he was happy and he went to sleep! So now we sign several diff words every night before he will go to sleep. To tell me he loves me he crosses his arms, we haven’t got them to the chest yet but its just so cute! He tells me just about anything he wants to eat saying it and signing it. He is trying very hard to learn some hard words like flower and elephant, its really cute. He points to the pic and then watches my mouth very closely for how I say it and tries to copy me. Flower is wower and he still isn’t sure about elephant but he is working on it. Sheep is shep and sit is more of a cuss word but he tries lol. His all time fav is HOT! He knows whats HOT and whats not so he walks up to things and sticks out his hand, he won’t touch them just to check to see if they are hot or not and he tells me if its hot. We have a lady in our church who is a licensed therapist and is a social worker. We were talking the other night about how Donavan is doing and she was impressed at how many signs and words to go with those signs that he knew. One day I was watching a you tube of some ppl signing a song and Donavan got so excited about it. I really hadn’t thought about letting him watch that kind of thing.
He also counts very well all the way to ten. Its cute, sometimes he leaves out a few numbers but for the most part he does them all. HE loves to say OH OKEY about everything, its his way of saying I heard you but I don’t want to do it. He has been fake crying lately, I don’t know why yet but we came home from shopping and Donavan was just in the house doing something and I was trying to put stuff away as Kels brought it in, and Donavan let out this wail and I though he had gotten hurt so I went running down the hall. He was mad because his ball was stuck in the door and he couldn’t get it out. So I said you want something to cry about, and I swatted him and said there is something to cry about you can’t just scream like that when you aren’t hurt. As I walked back down the hall I could hear Kelsey laughing outside. I know I sounded like a true parent!! But he was crying as if there was blood all over til he saw me.
Donavan doesn’t call me mom or mama or mommy, its Umma, and Kelsey is Diddy. He has said mama and daddy for a long time and now he calls us this, its really cute and he thinks he’s being funny about it.
The music Dept, is doing really wonderful. We’ve added four new ones since I last wrote in here. Two new tenors and an alto and a soprano. They are doing really well and catching on quickly We are still having weekly choir practices, I’ve you tube’d several of our songs. Kelsey is also doing individual vocal lessons, and those are coming along really great. We were supposed to start piano lessons this month and it just hasn’t panned out for some reason or another. Hopefully they will be worked in this Sept. We are singing at Mile High Praise Fest in Denver this next month. We are excited about doing that. We are doing two songs that I think will go over every well. Once that is over we are going to start working on Christmas songs. I know that sounds crazy to start so early but once the holidays get here everyone gets so busy and you are usually in a rush to work on whatever songs you want to do. So I decided to go ahead and start on it early so we can go slow and not work on a bunch at one time. I am VERY excited about starting on that. We are going to do a lot of really great ones with new twists to them. I really love Christmas!! And I am more than excited about putting this all together. Which is a good thing HA!
One thing that has been so totally awesome is how well we mesh with our Pastor and family. It seems service after service everything just seems to flow together. For instance working on this past Sunday, it was kind of hard. There were a few songs we wanted to do but neither of us felt like we needed to do them for this service. Then Kels said I really think we need to do I Feel the Joy because I can’t get that song out of my head. So we wrote it down and couldn’t figure out what to do around that song or before that song, so we let it sit for a bit and went about our day. Kelsey kept telling me all day I feel a preaching spirit on me, and I kept saying ok, but he wouldn’t elaborate on it. So finally I said, well what do you feel like God is wanting you to say? Do you feel led to shed some revelation, or to encourage and uplift or what exactly. He kept saying I’m not really sure. So we got to talking and I said something about it seems like every time we’ve sang this song here it really hasn’t went over well. I don’t think ppl are understanding what a jubilee is. ( We have a LOT of new saints in our church and we get a LOT of visitors and jubilee isn’t a word you use everday) maybe you can explain what that song is talking about. And he said I don’t know but I really feel like God is wanting me to preach a little bit. So we kept looking and all the sudden I’m Gonna Dance popped into my head. Several months ago I really felt led to have my aunt learn this song. For some reason I just kept feeling like she needed to sing this song, and when she sang it the place would explode. Now I don’t get these feelings often but I just knew this would happen.
Anyway Kels called Lisa and said, can you do it? Kelsey was feeling I Feel The Joy strongly and I was feeling I’m Gonna Dance strongly so we went with it.
Well once the ball started rolling it was still feeling right til we got to prayer request time. As the needs were being lifted (there was a lot, we have a lady in our church who was just diagnosed with cancer and some new ladies are really burdened for their lost loved ones, and there were many others) The service kind of shifted and started slowing down to a deep crying out to God. Now this has happened b4, Kels and I feeling like we needed to rejoice and then in the middle of the service kind of freak out thinking, oh no I really missed it this time!!! After prayer Bro Greg makes announcements and starts letting our visitors know how happy we are that they are here. And every time during this it seems like the Holy Ghost just starts shifting and stirring all around the room, and things just start lining up for whats about to happen next, that’s the only way I can explain it. So when they took up the offering the music started in and everyone seemed ready to rejoice. As they started singing, it was like the Holy Ghost came in the room like a flood over the people, and sure enough the place went up! They were singing I Feel The Joy and Kelsey stopped and started to give a revelation on this song and from where I was ( In the sound booth) it looked like lights were coming on over the peoples heads and when they started back up, the saints started dancing and rejoicing over the joy of the Lord. And then they went to I’m Gonna Dance and poof, that was it! I looked over and the ladies that went up for prayer were in a circle dancing and rejoicing. (ok I’m crying as I write this! It was just so awesome) Both songs were about I’m tired of the devil thinking he has control over me so I’m gonna kick my shoes off and dance for victory over the situation that I am in RIGHT NOW because I know that GOD is in control!!!
And this is how every service has been, just confirmation after confirmation that we are in tune with God and what is needed for each service. Please don’t think I’m bragging because I’m not. I seek God all week for every service and I spend hours putting the songs together making sure they all flow well and that it is what is needed, and every time Bro Greg gets up and preaches about something we have sang or we have a blow out like this past Sunday. Its really weird because when we sit down to plan, Sunday to Sunday seem to flow from where we left off from the last Sunday, and Wed to Wed flow from where we left off the Wed b4. I don’t know if this is normal for churches, but I find it very interesting how it doesn’t flow from one service to the next like Sunday to Wed to Sun. We have been doing a lot of contemporary songs, which is not Kelsey’s fav. But we like to keep a wide veriety to please everyone. He is doing better about it but still doesn’t like learning them. He said there is no progression chord wise, it just goes in a loop and he has a hard time figuring them out, whereas gospel music progresses and has syncopation, which to me the loop would seem easier cuz your doing the same thing over and over but what do I know right! Lol I don’t play so I really can’t say which is easier. There are several that I really like tho. I listened to a lot of contemporary in my early teens but slowly stopped and changed to S. Gospel. And Kelsey has slowly went from Black Gospel so a little S Gospel, so we have quite the variety going on let me tell ya. I can not tell you how many hrs I have set and just listened to song after song finding stuff for us to sing as praise songs to find that balance. I feel that it is SO important to make sure that there is a little for everyone. Kelsey feels the same way of course, and he is doing so much better about it all HA!
As for what I’ve been doing with my personal time, well there isn’t much of that by the end of the day. Which is why its been so long since I’ve wrote in here. I’m way behind in my reading books. Donavan wants to look and touch everything with me, its gotten to where I can barely eat with out him in my plate taking everything I have. He thinks all my food is his food even if he doesn’t like it. I almost feel like I have to hide to eat because it seems like mine is always better to him LOL! I told Kelsey I get a lot every time, not because I’m that hungry but because Donavan keeps stealing it all! HA He really loves noodles, oh my goodness he could live on it if I let him. And he wakes up saying cookie. He thinks all ice cream is his. I haven’t told him what ice cream is (as in this is ice cream, want a bite) because I don’t think he would ever stop asking for it. One day I had fixed myself a hot dog and he came up to the counter took the hot dog out of the bun and ate it all and came back and stole another one from me before I could eat it! It was kind of funny and kind of not because I was hungry and I kept having to go warm myself up another hot dog LOL. I have been taking a lot of pix lately. And not just of Donavan. I’ve been asked to do pix for two diff families lately and that is very exciting. I will have to upgrade my cam here soon if I keep this up! Not that I would mind lol
Well its extremely late and my eyes are crossing!
Hopefully I won’t wait to long to write in here again
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